Right on time, almost. A year later.
I've been practicing the slow down. Scanning my body to feel where my body is tight from stressors that are most times unnecessary. I ask why? Then I work on releasing. Grace.
I feel the worry of my future in terms of my career fade. I feel trust. I feel the courage to step into spaces that are daunting without the endgame. I feel as though I will overcome but if I fail I will try again with discipline. I feel patience. I feel my purpose acutely redefined. I feel my womanhood. I feel proud.
I feel when my mind pushes my thoughts and heart into its habitual dark. I feel when I summon my power to practice my dance back into the light. I feel the fear of losing my loved ones grow. I ignore it until it hits me hard in the slow moments like when I wash dishes. I feel the yearn the desire the dream of my man my partner my love. I feel the physical fight to keep my heart open. It's been so long since its felt a flutter. I feel my hips tighten. I feel I must stay in love for us to meet.
I feel it all wavering, as it should. I feel I need to tap out and go on a journey outside of this reality. My tender heart allows tears to flow with such ease that I have intentionally worked on balancing my emotions. I feel I've done well. I feel ecstatic. I feel like I need to drink more water.